209 (Sarcastic &) Funny Answers To “What’s Going On?

Jyoti Choudhary

We’ve all been there.

You get a text from someone asking, “What’s going on?” and you’re left trying to come up with a witty response that’s both informative and entertaining.

Well, fear not my friends.

We’ve got you covered with some sarcastic and funny answers to “What’s Going On?” that are sure to make your friends laugh (or roll their eyes, either way, mission accomplished).

A Healthy Dose of Sarcasm

Ah, sarcasm.

The perfect tool for when you want to communicate your disdain for small talk without actually offending anyone.

Here are some responses to “What’s Going On?” that will make your friends think twice before asking you that question again.

  1. Oh, you know, just single-handedly solving world hunger while juggling flaming swords. 🔥🍴
  2. Just trying to calculate how many licks it takes to get to the center of a black hole. 🌌🍭
  3. Same old, same old—battling against the army of dust bunnies under my bed. 🐰🛏️
  4. Currently engaged in a fierce debate with my cat about the existential meaning of catnip. 🐱🌿
  5. Attempting to decipher hieroglyphs on my laundry labels. 🧺🔍
  6. Engaged in a thrilling game of Hide and Seek with my motivation. 🕵️‍♂️🙈
  7. Just perfecting my ability to procrastinate like a pro. 🏆⏳
  8. Contemplating whether to become a professional pillow fluffer or a mattress tester. 💤🛏️
  9. Trying to figure out if I accidentally signed up for a reality show called Chaos in the Kitchen. 🍳🎥
  10. Playing a riveting game of Avoiding Responsibilities. 🎮❌
  11. Oh, you know, just attempting to break the world record for the longest time spent staring at a blank wall. 🕰️🖼️
  12. Currently on a mission to find out who ate the last slice of pizza. 🍕🕵️‍♀️
  13. Trying to decide whether to join a circus or start my own. 🎪🤹‍♂️
  14. Dealing with a severe case of existential crisis induced by a talking toaster. 🍞🗣️
  15. Engaged in an epic battle against the evil forces of tangled earphones. 🎧⚔️
  16. Just finished writing my autobiography titled The Perils of Procrastination. 📖💤
  17. Currently conducting experiments to determine if coffee can indeed be classified as a food group. ☕🔬
  18. Trying to decode the cryptic messages hidden in fortune cookies. 🥠🔍
  19. Attempting to teach my pet rock some new tricks. 🪨🎩
  20. Just won the Nobel Prize for Outstanding Achievements in the Field of Napping. 🏆😴
  21. Contemplating whether to start a band with my kitchen appliances. 🎸🥁

Turning it Around with a Little Wit

Who needs sarcasm when you can use wit to make your friends chuckle? Here are some responses to “What’s Going On?” that will make them double over with laughter (or at least crack a smile).

  1. Just out here contemplating the meaning of life while waiting for my pizza delivery 🍕
  2. Oh, you know, just attempting to break the world record for most procrastination 🏆
  3. Currently engaged in a riveting debate with my cat about the best flavor of ice cream 🐱🍦
  4. Just pretending to adult while secretly wishing I could nap all day 😴
  5. Surviving on coffee and sheer willpower, as one does ☕️
  6. Attempting to decipher the mysteries of the universe one Netflix binge at a time 📺
  7. Just casually avoiding responsibilities like they're optional chores 🚫
  8. Contemplating whether to join a synchronized swimming team or start a competitive underwater basket weaving league 🏊‍♂️🧺
  9. Strategically planning my next snack attack 🍫
  10. Trying to master the art of looking busy without actually doing anything productive 🎨
  11. Embracing the chaos and calling it my life motto 🌀
  12. Engaging in intense staring contests with inanimate objects to assert dominance 👀
  13. Plotting world domination one meme at a time 🌍
  14. Battling against my arch-nemesis, the snooze button ⏰
  15. Currently in the midst of a top-secret mission to locate the lost sock from the laundry 🕵️‍♂️
  16. Just casually rearranging the furniture for the hundredth time this week 🪑
  17. Trying to remember if I left the stove on three days ago 🤔
  18. Juggling more tasks than a circus clown on caffeine 🤹‍♂️
  19. Deciphering cryptic messages from my refrigerator magnets 🔍
  20. Contemplating whether to pursue a career in professional napping 💤
  21. Just here, living my best chaotic-neutral life 🌪

Reality Check, with a Twist

If you're feeling like getting deep and existential, try taking a sarcastic and humorous approach to "What's Going On?"

  1. Oh, you know, just juggling flaming swords while riding a unicycle 🤹‍♂️
  2. Trying to convince my pet rock to do the dishes 🪨🍽
  3. Pretending to be a functional adult, but failing spectacularly 🤷‍♂️
  4. Currently in a heated debate with my toaster about the meaning of life 🍞🤔
  5. Attempting to break the world record for most consecutive hours spent procrastinating 🏆⏳
  6. Contemplating whether I should start a career as a professional thumb wrestler 👍💼
  7. Engaged in a thrilling game of Where Did I Leave My Keys? 🔑🕵️‍♂️
  8. Wrestling with the existential dread that comes with knowing too much about celebrity gossip 🌟😱
  9. Fighting the urge to nap and pretending I'm not losing to it 😴💤
  10. Currently auditioning for the role of the next door's cat's best friend 🐱🎬
  11. Attempting to decipher the cryptic messages my plants keep sending me 🌱🔍
  12. Engaged in a fierce battle with my own laziness and losing horribly 🛋️💥
  13. Contemplating the philosophical implications of socks disappearing in the laundry 🧦🤔
  14. Having a staring contest with the wall and winning... or losing? 🧱👀
  15. Trying to convince my WiFi to cooperate by offering it virtual cookies 🍪📶
  16. Engaging in deep conversations with my houseplants about their hopes and dreams 🌿💬
  17. Currently mastering the art of staring blankly into space with purpose 🌌😶
  18. Fighting the existential crisis induced by realizing that my sock drawer is a black hole 🕳️🧦
  19. Negotiating a peace treaty between my cravings for junk food and my desire to be healthy 🍔🥦
  20. Attempting to teach my goldfish Morse code. Progress: slow 🐠🔤
  21. Contemplating the futility of trying to fold a fitted sheet. Spoiler alert: it always wins 🛏️🥊

Humor in the Face of Boredom

So you're feeling a little bored and uninspired, huh? Don't worry, we've all been there.

But why not use this opportunity to inject a little humor into your response to "What's Going On?" Here are some witty comebacks that are sure to make your friends chuckle (or at least give you a pity laugh).

  1. Oh, you know, just contemplating the mysteries of the universe while staring at my ceiling fan spin endlessly. 🌀
  2. Trying to decide if I should take up professional napping as a career or just keep it as a hobby. 💤
  3. Plotting world domination... from the comfort of my couch, of course. 🌎🛋️
  4. Attempting to train my pet rock to fetch the remote. Progress is slow. 🪨📺
  5. Just enjoying a riveting conversation with the houseplants. They're surprisingly good listeners. 🌿🗣️
  6. Engaged in an intense staring contest with the fridge. So far, it's winning. 🥶
  7. Contemplating the meaning of life, or at least trying to remember where I left my keys. 🔑
  8. Battling the existential dread that comes with deciding what to watch on Netflix. 📺😩
  9. Communing with my inner sloth. It's a slow process. 🦥
  10. Debating whether to order pizza for the third time this week or mix things up with a fourth. 🍕
  11. Just casually rearranging the items on my desk for the 27th time today. 📚✏️
  12. Playing hide-and-seek with my motivation. Spoiler alert: It's winning. 🕵️‍♂️🏆
  13. Contemplating the futility of folding fitted sheets. Seriously, what's the point? 🤔🛏️
  14. Trying to convince the cat that I am, in fact, not a giant toy. It's not going well. 🐱
  15. Contemplating the sheer audacity of dust for daring to settle on my furniture. 🧹
  16. Wondering if plants have existential crises when they outgrow their pots. 🌱😳
  17. Just casually pondering if socks have feelings when they mysteriously disappear in the laundry. 🧦🤔
  18. Attempting to solve the age-old mystery of why my phone charger only works when positioned at a precise angle. 🔌
  19. Debating whether to take up interpretive dance as a form of communication with the neighbors. 💃🏻🕺🏻
  20. Just marveling at the fact that I can't remember what day it is... again. 📅🤷‍♂️
  21. Engaged in a thrilling game of How many times can I refresh my social media feed before something interesting happens? 🔄📱

When You’re Feeling Philosophical

When someone asks you "What's Going On?" it's a great opportunity to take a deep dive into the mysteries of life, and why not do it with a sarcastic and humorous twist? Here are some responses that are sure to make your friends question your sanity (in the best way possible).

  1. Contemplating the meaning of life while stuck in traffic 🚗
  2. Reflecting on the existential crisis of mismatched socks 🧦
  3. Pondering the cosmic significance of finding a perfect avocado 🥑
  4. Deliberating the complexities of parallel universes over morning coffee ☕
  5. Questioning the sanity of squirrels collecting nuts for winter 🐿️
  6. Analyzing the intricate dance of chaos theory in a dropped plate of spaghetti 🍝
  7. Ruminating on the profoundness of cat memes 🐱
  8. Speculating about the universe's most pressing question: why do we park in driveways and drive on parkways? 🚙
  9. Debating the likelihood of a zombie apocalypse over brunch 🧟
  10. Considering the philosophical implications of accidentally hitting reply all 📧
  11. Contemplating the true purpose of belly button lint 🌀
  12. Reflecting on the profoundness of a well-timed dad joke 🤣
  13. Pondering the mysteries of why socks disappear in the laundry 🧦
  14. Analyzing the deeper meaning behind a perfectly timed hiccup 🥤
  15. Reflecting on the philosophical significance of a perfectly popped popcorn kernel 🍿
  16. Speculating on the existential crisis of a dropped ice cream cone 🍦
  17. Debating the absurdity of the snooze button's existence ⏰
  18. Contemplating the metaphysical implications of a double rainbow 🌈
  19. Reflecting on the universe's sense of irony when your phone dies at 1% battery 📱
  20. Pondering the philosophical depth of a perfectly executed high-five 🖐️
  21. Analyzing the existential angst of a potato chip bag that won't open properly 🥔

how to respond to what's going on text

Ah, the age-old question of "What's Going On?" It's the perfect opportunity to showcase your wit and humor.

Here are some tips on how to respond in the most entertaining way possible:

  1. Oh, you know, just riding the emotional rollercoaster of life 🎢
  2. Trying to figure out which socks actually have matching pairs 🧦
  3. Battling the never-ending saga of tangled headphones 🎧
  4. Contemplating the meaning of the universe... or just what to have for lunch 🌯
  5. Attempting to decode the mysterious language of cats 😼
  6. Wrestling with the eternal struggle of fitting too much stuff into too small a space 📦
  7. Playing detective to solve the case of the disappearing socks and pens 🔍
  8. Diving deep into the abyss of existential dread... or maybe just Netflix 📺
  9. Juggling deadlines like a circus performer with a caffeine addiction 🤹‍♂️☕
  10. Trying to remember where I left my keys... for the hundredth time 🗝️
  11. Engaging in intense negotiations with my alarm clock ⏰
  12. Dancing through the minefield of adulting with varying degrees of grace 💃
  13. Waging war against the pile of dishes that's threatening to take over the kitchen 🍽️
  14. Crafting elaborate theories about why the Wi-Fi always chooses the worst times to act up 📡
  15. Engaging in a battle of wits with technology that seems determined to outsmart me 🤖
  16. Navigating the treacherous waters of social interactions with my introverted soul 🚣‍♂️
  17. Trying to maintain my sanity in a world that seems determined to test it at every turn 🤯
  18. Waging a valiant crusade against the tyranny of never-ending laundry piles 👚
  19. Slaying dragons and conquering kingdoms... in my dreams 🐉
  20. Dodging existential crises like a pro and pretending everything's fine 😅
  21. Just another day in the grand adventure of being gloriously, chaotically human 🌟

what's going on reply to boy

Ah, the classic "What's Going On?" text from a boy.

How to respond in a way that's both funny and flirty? Well, here are some ideas that might just make him chuckle (or at least respond back):

  1. Just negotiating world peace while juggling flaming swords. 🔥
  2. Oh, you know, just solving quadratic equations in my head. No biggie. 🤓
  3. Trying to teach my pet rock to fetch. Progress is slow. 🪨
  4. Currently practicing my ninja moves in case the apocalypse hits. 🥋
  5. Attempting to count all the grains of sand on the beach. Spoiler: I lost count. 🏖️
  6. Deeply contemplating the meaning of life, the universe, and why socks disappear in the laundry. 🤔
  7. Just perfecting my telepathic communication skills. Can you hear me now? 🧠
  8. Wrestling with a particularly stubborn pickle jar. It's a battle of wills. 💪
  9. Trying to figure out how to become a superhero overnight. Any tips? 🦸‍♂️
  10. Currently engaged in a heated debate with my houseplants. They’re quite opinionated. 🌱
  11. Oh, you know, just being fabulous. It's a full-time job. 💁‍♂️
  12. Dodging responsibilities like they're flying daggers. Watch out! ⚔️
  13. Attempting to break the world record for the longest staring contest with my cat. 🐱
  14. Just won an argument with a door. It's surprisingly satisfying. 🚪
  15. Channeling my inner zen while simultaneously stressing about everything. Namaste. 🧘‍♂️
  16. Trying to decipher the secret language of squirrels. They're onto something, I swear. 🐿️
  17. Plotting to overthrow the reign of the alarm clock. It's time for a revolution. ⏰
  18. Currently composing a sonnet dedicated to my love-hate relationship with Mondays. 📝
  19. Battling a fierce case of the procrastination monster. It's winning. 🦖
  20. Just broke the land-speed record for procrastination. Achievement unlocked! 🏆
  21. Attempting to master the art of procrastination. So far, I’m excelling. 🎨

what's going on reply on whatsapp

Ah, the convenience of messaging apps like WhatsApp.

You can communicate with your friends and family without ever leaving the comfort of your bed (or couch, or wherever you happen to be).

But what to say when someone asks you "What's Going On?" on WhatsApp? Here are some witty and sarcastic responses that are sure to make them regret ever hitting that send button:

  1. Just chilling like a villain, you know? 😎
  2. Attempting to decode the mysteries of the universe, one emoji at a time. 🤔🌌
  3. Just dodging responsibilities like Neo dodges bullets in The Matrix. 💼🔫
  4. Contemplating whether to take a nap or pretend to be productive. 😴💼
  5. Trying to remember what day of the week it is... 📅
  6. Avoiding adulting at all costs. 👶🚫
  7. Procrastinating like a pro. 🏆
  8. Just binge-watching Netflix and pretending it's research. 📺🔍
  9. Engaging in some serious existential crisis management. 🤯
  10. Mentally drafting my acceptance speech for the Laziest Person Alive award. 🏆💤
  11. Engaged in an epic battle against the forces of boredom. ⚔️😴
  12. Just another day in the thrilling saga of avoiding responsibilities. 💼🏃‍♂️
  13. Trying to find the perfect balance between pretending to be busy and actually being productive. ⚖️💼
  14. Contemplating the meaning of life, the universe, and why there's always a missing sock in the laundry. 🤔🧦
  15. Struggling to maintain my status as the reigning champion of procrastination. 🏆😅
  16. Just juggling multiple existential crises like a circus performer. 🎪🤹‍♂️
  17. Currently engaged in a heated debate with my bed about whether it's too early to call it a day. 🛌🕒
  18. Trying to decide if I should adult today or if it can wait until tomorrow... or the day after... or next week. 🤷‍♂️
  19. Attempting to break the world record for the longest time spent staring into space. 🌌👀
  20. Exploring the depths of my procrastination skills while avoiding anything resembling productivity. 🕳️💤
  21. Just embracing the chaos and riding the wave of uncertainty like a boss. 🌊🤙

what's going on reply to girl

Ah, the classic "What's Going On?" text from a girl.

How to respond in a way that's both funny and flirty? Well, fear not, my dear boys, we've got you covered.

Here are some ideas that might just make her chuckle (or at least respond back):

  1. Just trying to figure out how to adult without crying 😅
  2. Oh, you know, just contemplating the meaning of life and whether pizza counts as a vegetable 🤔🍕
  3. Currently in the middle of a heated debate with my cat about who owns the remote 🐱📺
  4. Attempting to navigate the treacherous waters of adulthood without a map... or a clue 🗺️😬
  5. Just dodging responsibilities like it's an Olympic sport 🥇
  6. Trying to decide between napping or more napping 😴💤
  7. Engaged in a thrilling battle with my laundry pile the laundry is winning 🧺🥇
  8. Currently in a staring contest with my fridge, waiting for food to magically appear 🍽️✨
  9. Contemplating whether it's socially acceptable to eat ice cream for breakfast 🍦🤔
  10. Pretending to be a functioning member of society while secretly binge-watching Netflix 📺🤫
  11. Strategizing my next move in the ongoing war against Monday mornings ⚔️🌞
  12. Trying to remember if I turned off the stove... for the third time today 🔥🤯
  13. Just trying to survive the chaos of everyday life with a sprinkle of sarcasm and a dash of caffeine ☕😏
  14. Currently debating whether it's too late to join the circus 🎪🤹‍♂️
  15. Wondering if aliens are secretly watching us and taking notes 🛸👽
  16. Juggling more tasks than a circus clown with a caffeine addiction 🤹‍♂️☕
  17. Contemplating the mysteries of the universe, like why socks always disappear in the laundry 🧦🕵️‍♂️
  18. Trying to solve the age-old question: why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways? 🚗🤔
  19. Just enjoying the thrilling rollercoaster ride of life, complete with unexpected drops and loops 🎢😅
  20. Currently in a battle against my inbox, where emails seem to multiply like rabbits 📧🐰
  21. Embracing the chaos with open arms and a sarcastic grin, because what else can you do? 🤷‍♂️😄

what's going on reply answer funny

Alright, let's cut to the chase.

You want some funny responses to "What's Going On?" Well, you're in luck because we've got a whole bunch of them.

Get ready to make your friends laugh (or groan, depending on their sense of humor).

  1. Just trying to figure out if it's Monday or Friday... again. 🤔
  2. Contemplating the mysteries of the universe, like why socks always disappear in the laundry. 🧦
  3. Oh, you know, just playing hide and seek with my motivation. It's winning. 🙈
  4. Attempting to break the world record for consecutive hours spent procrastinating. 🏆
  5. Engaging in intense negotiations with my alarm clock every morning. It's a tough opponent. ⏰
  6. Pretending to adult while secretly wishing for a nap. 💤
  7. Battling against the never-ending flow of emails like a modern-day hero. 📧
  8. Trying to convince my cat that I am indeed the ruler of the household. It's a tough sell. 🐱
  9. Engaged in deep philosophical discussions with my pet rock. 🪨
  10. Debating whether to order pizza or attempt to cook something remotely resembling a meal. 🍕
  11. Mastering the art of pretending to listen during Zoom meetings. 🎭
  12. Just narrowly escaping the clutches of the evil laundry pile. It's a close call every time. 👕
  13. Contemplating the meaning of life, or at least the meaning of my Netflix queue. 📺
  14. Dodging responsibilities like a ninja dodges shurikens. 🥋
  15. Trying to remember what day it is without consulting three different calendars. 📅
  16. Engrossed in a thrilling game of How many tabs can I have open before my browser crashes? 🚀
  17. Engaging in top-secret negotiations with the fridge over who gets the last slice of cake. 🍰
  18. Attempting to solve the age-old mystery of why my phone charger always disappears. 🔌
  19. Participating in the Olympic sport of Avoiding Eye Contact with Neighbors. 🏅
  20. Deciphering hieroglyphics, a.k.a. my doctor's handwriting on prescriptions. 💊
  21. Just trying to keep up with the Kardashians... I mean, with life. It's hard to tell the difference sometimes. 💁‍♀️

So there you have it, folks.

A whole bunch of funny responses to "What's Going On?" Use them wisely (or not so wisely, depending on your mood).

Just remember, a little humor can go a long way in making even the most mundane conversation a little bit more entertaining.

Thanks for reading! 209 (Sarcastic &) Funny Answers To “What’s Going On? you can check out on google.

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